If you read my articles on exposition and explanatory writing style, then you already know that telling instead of showing in writing can be a turn off for many readers. But there’s a specific type of exposition that annoys me most: internal monologuing. 

What is internal monologuing? 

You might already know about the monologue, which screenwriters and playwrights use (it’s when a character goes into some kind of speech).

If you’re like me, your brain immediately takes you back to The Incredibles when Syndrome exclaims, “You sly dog, you had me monologuing!” after the hero got him to drone on about his evil plans. 

Internal monologuing in a book is when we get passages of text that are just about what the main character is thinking. Writers usually use it as a tool for character development. 

• For example: you might be reading a book with internal monologuing if something like this happens: 1) the scene starts, 2) a character says something, 3) six paragraphs of the main character’s headspace, 4) finally see the other character’s response.

Is that a bad thing? 

Internal monologuing as a narrative technique has some key drawbacks:

• It verges into telling instead of showing, which is less dynamic and engaging 
• Excessive use slows down the pacing of a story, making it tedious and boring
• It can come across as contrived, which takes us out of the reading experience

I tend to rate books with a lot of internal monologuing lower.

If the main character spends a lot of time talking to me directly instead of engaging with the story, it’s very likely that it won’t be one of my highly rated reads.